The Unknown Performer
Written by Rev. Philip Stonhouse
Around 2010 I was taking absurdist drama and was taking a playwriting class. This is an absurdist monologue, which is what it sounds like: absurd. The character is confronting the absurd reality of being watched, paid to be entertaining, with every word meant to hold meaning. Absurdism is very strange, but it is important to look at the things we do and question the norms we have created. Entertainment has its place, but are we asking it to do more than it can.
Commentary below:
Actor: (A man sits in a chair facing the audience he is looking down minding his own business. He looks up to find people looking back at him and quickly looks down again. Now slowly realizing that they are still staring at him, he looks perplexed for a moment. Looks slowly up again and then looks behind him over both shoulders but sees nothing. Even more confused he looks back down. Now getting slowly very nervous about the whole thing grabs something to read. Realizing he cannot pay attention to reading he adjusts it up so that now it’s blocking his vision of their staring. He quickly moves the paper down and says ) “Ok What?” . . . Hi . . . seriously (closing the paper) . . . OK (drops the paper. Looks around a bit more but then looks back at them and gives a hand gesture for what) Is there something on my face? (wipes) better? No? K, What? You want money . . . ? Obviously, I can’t give you any that’s why I’m (gesturing) here. You want me to say something? Okay, I can to do that: Easy as Pylons, a Piece of cake that’s eaten its Phil before you do. Oh and please don’t I’d personally really appreciate it if you didn’t. Ummm . . . . Pickle . . . grasshopper . . . lime . . . no, no too green. No, remember your lessons. Green is serene, yellow is mellow, red is not dead unless you bled . . . Ooooo, something blue: Water, sky . . . Why Sky? I’m tired. I don’t like this character anymore. She’s too acute, she should be right or obtuse. She also doesn’t like kittens, which is a deal breaker for me. This was my own personal insight, it wasn’t in the script and no it doesn’t serve the character, I just know. I sit, I lean, I fall . . . Oh right you want me to say something . . . Ummm . . . Something clever, original and insightful? Life is . . . green . . . no. Yellow, purple, orange, red brown, sapphire, occur . . . no!!!! What am I in a Webber now or something? Don’t let me get caught in that. Sit moving, speak loudly, work softly, listen to your book. And of course be distracted. Ok, let me take another run at this. Life is . . . . now . . . How’s that? That’s pretty blue. I’m now, your now, and they’ve passed. Does that wet your brow? Tickle your fancy? Jump your boots? No? Well, I guess the best I can do is join you. (Goes and sits down in the audience) As I always say “If you can’t eat them, they are probably not edible.
Commentary: There is a strangeness and absurdity to theatre that you really have to forgo if you want to enter in. Here we are people living our lives, watching a bunch of people live out someone else’s or pretend lives, all while pretending we aren’t there watching. Our lives are also absurd in their own way, some of us work in jobs where we never see the fruit, some of us are surrounded by people and yet lonely, some of us no very little about our lives and yet we live in it. Some of us believe we need to be something else to be happy or accepted, yet that would mean we are no longer ourselves. Some of us seek answers or wisdom from others in the same place as us, or from things that definitely can’t give them. Absurdity is in our own lives and recognizing that absurdity will help us to find goodness and whole truth because it will help us reach beyond the absurdities we live in. Ultimately, the greatest absurdity is that we seek so many things from things that aren’t the source: God. Like someone that goes to a bucket every day for water, not realizing that it is only full when it rains. Meaning, answers, happiness, acceptance, productivity, community and so much more can only be fickle absurd realities unless they are founded in the truth laid out from creation by our giving, loving, creator God.
