Faith in the Midst of Doubt
How well do you know God? It often feels like we can never know God enough. Like there is always something more to dig into. Like there is always some degree of mystery. That is why as much as we know, we will always need faith. In fact, knowledge of God and faith in him in this life can often feel like the same thing, because at one point or another, we have to trust what we do know about God. Today, we get three responses of doubt to that lack of knowledge and only one of them leads to faith. What we find, is that only faith in the midst of doubt leads to life.
So, last week we left off with Egypt still persecuting the enslaved Israelites. God had chosen Moses to deliver them. Moses made every excuse not to go. Yet, because he stayed in the conversation with God, he eventually was convinced. Now Moses is joined by his brother Aaron to appear to Israel and Pharoah on God’s behalf.
Moses and Aaron appear to Pharoah and speak what God has told them. It is interesting. Did you notice what they ask Pharoah for? They ask Pharoah, not for complete freedom, but simply for the freedom to throw a festival for God in the wilderness. We already know that God wants to save them and deliver them out of slavery in Egypt into a broad land of prosperity, but what good could a simple festival to God do? Three days off as we hear only a few lines later. What good could three days of worship, prayer, and sacrifice do to such a horrendous situation as slavery and genocide?
I think these questions already point to our doubt and lack of understanding. Every Sunday as we worship, pray, and give back to God we join in the powerful, mysterious, and very good work of God. Through worship, we are reaching up to understand God. Through prayer, we are connecting and building a relationship with God. Through sacrifice, we are trusting God enough to give him our lives and our situations. These all equip us to do God’s good work in ways we never could without them, and we are then equipped to help others do the same. Every service together becomes an invitation to enter and realize the Kingdom of God more and more. We can only imagine how this could have transformed Israel and Egypt.
This is a very simple ask. What would three days off be to Pharoah in the grand scheme of things? Probably very little, outside of it requiring a change of character; he would be offering a little mercy in the midst of almost absolute tyranny. Egypt had many festivals and many gods throughout history, they would have understood this request, but how does Pharoah respond? “Who is this Lord, that I should obey him and let Israel go? I do not know the Lord and I will not let Israel go.” Pharoah immediately doubts God, puts himself above God, and rejects God and Israel completely.
We might be tempted to forgive Pharoah a little for not knowing our God, yet that would be losing track of what has happened and is happening. Remember that the Pharoah who accepted and lifted up Joseph to become his second in command in Egypt somehow knew God and recognized God’s work and Spirit in Joseph. God is consistently revealing himself to people, even beyond Israel. In a polytheistic faith like Egyptian, another God would not be beyond the scope. Then at this moment, the new Pharoah isn’t just saying he doesn’t know about God’s authority, he is saying I don’t care about it, I’m not even willing to think about it, or ever follow God or obey. Then it isn’t just that Pharoah doesn’t know God, but it would seem as if he never wants to know God. Even before anything begins, Pharoah’s heart is so hard, he is so closed off from God, that we can see he has already drastically removed himself from life, justice, and even mercy. It is not an easy thing to admit or come to terms with, but if Pharoah is unwilling to join God in any way, then it is obvious that he has become an enemy of life and justice, so something drastic needs to be done to restore life and bring about justice.
We may resist this greatly. Isn’t there another way? Couldn’t he be overthrown with love? Couldn’t God do something like what he did on the cross with Jesus? The problem is that love is always an offer. It needs to be welcomed and accepted. The reality is that God and Israel had already sacrificed a lot. Up until now, they had given up their flesh, their time, energy, and pain in slavery, they had put their lives on the line to protect their children and God had to endure and protect them through it to make them fruitful and multiply. Israel at this moment is a precursor to Christ’s suffering, love, and death, which leads to an even more abundant life. Even Jesus does something similar to what is happening to Egypt; in his life, Jesus consistently challenges and overthrows the religious leaders and it is only 40 years after Jesus' death that through Rome, God tears down the temple in Jerusalem.
Even today, we can acknowledge such drastic cases when someone, a group, or even a great swath of a nation has turned against life and needs to be overthrown in some way. I think like God, we would rather that overthrow be a peaceful one, and like God, it should rend our hearts for the hurt of any person or community, but we must trust that God is always love and knows what is best in the midst of all of it, even when we don’t. Just another aspect of our need to know and have faith in God.
When faced with God’s request or even the opportunity to meet God, a lot of people aren’t just resistant, but they outright reject the chance to know God and end up fighting against him. At this moment, Pharoah calls Israel lazy for something that almost every Egyptian would have done and he increases the work the Israelites were already struggling with. Then he calls God’s words deceptive and leads others to turn away from God and life as well. This might feel like a fairly drastic reaction and uncommon, but when I think about it, I have seen it often in my life and even in myself. It is all too easy to reject God and fight against him, hurting others in the process.
The next person to doubt is Moses. We saw how he tried to speak to Pharoah and the only result was more pain, struggle, and sacrifice for Israel. Moses sees all of this hurt and blames God, “why have you mistreated these people?” This is again an interesting comment. We just saw how it was Pharoah and all the Egyptians following him that were actually acting out this abuse, tyranny, and slavery. What God did was use Moses to ask for freedom, it was Pharoah who responded negatively. We often respond the same way: God why are you doing this to Ukraine, why did you give someone cancer, why did this disaster have to happen? Yet, we know who is attacking Ukraine, we know that cancer is cells rebelling against the body, and we know that natural disasters are a natural consequence of something already in nature.
What we are getting right, when saying this, is that we are recognizing that to some degree God didn’t overthrow that natural consequence or reaction, he let something negative, painful, and even destructive happen. By giving anyone else or anything else control, God has let them steer the vehicle into dangerous places. God, why didn’t you lead us out of it? Why didn’t you take control? This is hard to wrestle with. We love the stories of God’s miraculous healings or salvation, but at the same time, we struggle when he has to take control in other ways like with what will come in Egypt.
In the midst of these very hard questions, that are very true to our experience we must trust that God knows what is best for us and is trying to lead us out of them. Moses might start in a place of doubt, but God reassures him and points him toward how they will overthrow Egypt in order to deliver and restore all of Israel.
Did you notice what God says he is going to do for Israel through all of this saving work? He tells them that he is going to make himself known. He is going to become their God and they are going to become his people. Through my actions, you will know that I am the God who saves. He wants them to know him more. He wants to have a relationship with him. He wants them to trust him more. Because he knows through this faith, he can lead them toward life and bounty in a new land.
God’s work is restoration and new life, but it isn’t always easy to see when we are in the midst of slavery, weakness, and death. The Israelites are the last ones to doubt. They are so overcome by the things they are experiencing that they couldn’t even listen to Moses. They couldn’t even hear, let alone see the hope God is offering. They didn’t yet have enough faith or knowledge of God to live into what God was promising. Again, this feels very real to our experiences. God, give us more faith.
We need more faith, but when we don’t have it, we need the people in our lives who do. At this moment, even though Israel couldn’t see the hope, Moses, even though he has doubts himself, is still willing to step into faithful action and they are, mostly, willing to follow him. We will see that both Moses' faithful leadership and their willingness to follow even in doubt will make the biggest difference.
God is not surprised by our doubt. We should be asking questions and asking to know more. God wants to reveal himself to us and build a relationship with us. But in the midst of our doubt, we must remain faithful, trusting what we already know, we must remain open, and we must be willing to follow God. That is not easy. There are plenty of things that stand in God’s way, whether it be ourselves, what we see, or what we experience, but God is consistently there too, trying to guide us and pull us out. Through worship, prayer, and sacrifice, we can come to see God better, know him and trust him. Let us seek to know God better, so that we might live out even more faithful lives, leading others into the life and bounty God wants for all of us.
